Faster than a Speeding Tractor

It's not ideal having both an empty passport and a bicycle.  The two just don't quite seem to match up.  I should be bouncing around the world mustering stamps and visas like my life depends on it (everyone judges you for having an empty passport and it's not pretty) - but I'm not - I've resorted to being the slowest thing on the road.

And that's why I'm still on my way to Chiang Mai... and at this rate I might be forever...

DAY 5 - Nakon Sawan - Phonsoluk

With all the niceities of aircon behind me, I sped away on my little Mao (Chinese tyrant bicycle) - it was 140 km to my destination and I was feeling hardcore. Despite it being my biggest day yet, I figured I could do all that and the 64 extra kilometers to Sukhothai...

This province seems to have a strange facination with frogs!!!

I managed 70 km before taking a break at what I thought was a cafe'... Turns out it was a temple... and I was just in time for the morning prayers. But it was interesting chinging cokes with the monks afterwards - I just hope all the ceremonial things doesn't mean I've converted... I'm not ready to convert!

The coke fueled another 20 km before the heat melted me and sentenced me to looting around a petrol station for hours both smelling and looking like a hobo - Great way to have personal space and make friends with people you know don't care about appearances!

But the afternoon killed me. The road markers seemed to get further and further apart. The '40km' sign repeated itself 3 times over 5 kilometers - my butt ached something fierce, and the knee pain I'd been expecting finally arrived. It was hell.

Miracles happen though - I arrived. A motto taxi led me (for free) to an awesome $3 hotel, dinner was amazing and I even spoilt myself by investing in a large sprite. That's right - I went all out!

And then I crashed.

DAY 6 - Phonsoluk - Sukhathai

I slept so well that I overslept three hours and ended up riding in the middle of the day - not ideal - but I craved English so beadly (yes, this is how bad my English had become) that I didn't care. It was only 64 km anyway...

I pulled into a random street cafe' 25 km out to fuel up on liquids and met a German and Korean missionary who were busy holding a church service... Which was great, because even if I converted the previous day, I'd been reconverted today.

I'm proud to say that 10km out of Sukhothai I was officially not the slowest thing on the road, and I even slowed to take the picture... that's right - I'm faster than a speeding tractor!!!

And Sukhothai is like heaven - it's as hot as hell but there are swimming pools and restaurants and beautiful gardens and crazy ruins and smiling people and even English and that's why I'm still here... lazing at the pool, banana honey smoothie in one hand, menu to order some delicious Thai food in the other. Life is good. [Maybe not so much for my masseuse from earlier who is still recovering after falling off the bed trying to click my back...but for everyone else] 

Even if travelling like a snail has it's downfalls [and mum offers to pay for busses/ cars or flights so I can come visit her in China faster], it's moments like this one that would only be half as good if I didn't earn them!

Back to Bisex

[*'Bisex' being 'Basix' mixed with 'Bike'.... not 'Bisexual' - I tell you this now in an attempt to not disappoint just in case that is what you were after]

The odd rest spot where sometimes you find hammocks... other times you get free drinks 

It’s been a long time coming, but I can proudly say that Bangkok is officially behind me. About 350 km behind me. After 12 visits to the city (5 of them this year) I’ve finally moved on. Now it’s just me and the bike and the teddy bear and the [sometimes very big and busy and scary] wide-open road all the way to Chiang Mai!

Day 1: Bangkok – Dutch Embassy - Ayuttaya

After a morning spent hunting down the Dutch embassy I’ve been there 3 times already, I really should know how to get there by now) to pick up my brand spanking new 65 page diplomatic passport (HOOORAAH – no more worries of a full passport!!!) I was out of there… out of the stench and grime and misdemeanors that make Bangkok tick… Well, sort of out of there… admittantly I did a few accidental laps of the city first.

And I was doing pretty well too until I got a flat tyre… my 7^th in a week. I was only 9km away from my destination so I decided to just pump it up and cycle like the wind but [and this is embarrassing], I couldn’t work out how to use my pump and for the first time I had no cycle buddies to help me out. About a kilometer walk down the road a motorcycle mechanic took pity on me, changed my tyre, mended a spare, and gave me 2 liters of water and then refused payment. I’d like to mention that this was the third time I’d been donated bottles of water today, not to mention the free energy drinks and coffee. Thai people are so lovely!!!

Cycling down the road my back tyre began deflating, but I was too ashamed to return and instead sucked it up and cycled with a flat. I arrived at about the same time as the moon…

Day 2: Learning to fix a tyre

Coming from the slums of Bangkok, Tony’s Guesthouse was a mecca of clean perfection so it wasn’t a massive ask to decide to stick around Ayuttaya for a day to learn how to fix a tyre and it only took 2 hours of frustration, but I now know how to remove, mend and reattach a wheel [I think] and that’s progress!

Auttaya at sunset

Ayuttaya is also a great place to finally sort out your car insurance only 5 months after leaving Australia [and my camper van]…

The ruins of the city are impressive too and an evening cycle to see the clusters of ancient temples at sunset is well recommended!  

Day 3: Ayuttaya – Sing Buri – In Buri

After reading three different cycle forums and reading how each got their first flat tyre on the way to Sing Buri, I decided to leave at dawn – one for them probably signified 15 for me (at least)… But alas, by 12 I’d cycled the 100 odd km puncture free and was unsure of what to do next.

After lunch, I escaped the heat of the day by googling hotels in the next 70 km and the interweb informed me they didn’t exist… Obviously I wanted to prove the internet wrong…

….I spent the night sleeping with a local family who tried to marry me off and force me to stay forever so I could be the village English teacher.

My local 'mum'

Day 4: In Buri – Nakhon Sawan

After a night of bed bugs and strange noises mossies, I hit the road exhausted and it’s hard enough to stay awake when the roads are straight and quiet and dull and flat so I’ve taken to counting things:

Rabid dogs who chase you and try and bite: too many

Trees that actually shade my side of the road: 6

Dead Snakes: 124

Living Snakes: None. They’ve all been killed

Military vehicles, carrying armed soldiers (big guns in hand) and tanks: 104 – It got to the point where I was expecting to cycle into a full fledged war zone. Wait, I haven’t read the news in a while, is Thailand a war zone???

And now I’m here. I stopped in Nakhon Sawan because that’s where every other cyclist stops and I couldn’t handle breaking more hearts. I’m hiding in my hotel room because it’s hot outside and downstairs is packed with Thai business men trying to force [against my wishes of course] alcohol upon me and it’s the fifth time since I left South Africa the last time (507 days ago I think) that I have air con and I feel like I need to make the most of it.

I’m only 578 km away from Chiang Mai and haven’t a clue what the future holds. Tomorrow I travel onwards… Probably.